Pick your problems…

The older I get the more I do believe that there is no such thing as a perfect life. Sure we’ve all heard that there isn’t such a thing as a perfect life but it never stops us from trying to achieve it anyway.

If only we had a different partner or no partner at all, if only we had a better family or more money or more whatever or less of something else etc…. our minds do a great job of focusing on the negative in our lives while ignoring the positives.


I feel like a slow learner, I also feel like someone who was never good at listening to advice but learning from experience and what experience seems to have shown me is there is not a problem free scenario for life, all we can do is pick the problems we want to tackle.

A relationship for instances has many benefits, some of them include loyalty, comfort and familiarity but this comes at the expense of our freedom, at the feeling of being trapped and confined. Being single has ultimate freedom but at the expense of no loyalty and usually not being able to connect with another person on a deeper level, something we all crave.

Being ordinary, living a simple life has the problem of ” being average” ” not living up to your potential” which in a world, especially in western society that looks down on such a mediocre life can make us feel like we should be doing more…the benefit though of such an ordinary life is being able to keep private, to blend into the background, not needing to live up to an image or being constantly in the spotlight which is a dream many famous and wealthy people wish they can have.


Relationships and money are just a couple of examples where no matter what you do you will run into problems but there are countless other situations and scenarios in life that with a bit of self reflection you can find out for yourself.

Before Spirituality, when I was younger, I was convinced that there was a perfect way to live, that a perfect life did exist you just had to work hard for it, you just had to keep changing and controlling the external conditions around you until you got there…eventually I realised while it’s true we all have preferences and we aren’t here to be a door mat or just blindly listen and follow how we should live our lives without question, the biggest realisation I came to was that no matter what we do, our situation is always going to appear not complete or imperfect in some way and instead of trying to control and manage every last detail to realise that we must surrender to the fact that life is imperfect, to find peace not in the absence of problems but in the midst of them.


I truly view life as a rigged game much like a casino game, no matter how you bet, no matter what strategy you use, no matter if you play this game or that, in the end you lose because the odds are in favour of the casino. Be in a relationship and have problems, be single and have problems, become lazy and have problems, become a workaholic and have problems, become introvert or extrovert, have kids or don’t have kids, live for now or be frugal for the future, a future that may never come, the list is endless…but what I’m pointing to is that life is never about perfection.

I’ve mentioned in other posts how life is always under the ying yang principle. When we look out in the world we can only see imperfection because when we look inward we can only see perfection. Outwardly there appears to be time and space because inwardly we are timeless and dimensionless. We are inwardly divine yet outwardly flawed.

Getting absorbed entirely in the outside world causes frustration and suffering, but seeing the outside world as the balancing force to our inner world brings us a sense of inner peace and calm. Life is a rigged game because it gives us challenges, it gives us something to do, it gives us the gift of feeling the wild ride of human emotions. Perfection craves to experience imperfection and vice versa the two are always one and give life to one another.


Just realise that we are never doing life wrong, that the people we admire and feel have the perfect life are suffering with their own insecurities and problems as well. Like I said life is rigged, what people have in an abundance in one area of life is usually at the expense of another area. Life is just a perfect imperfect mess, it just is what it is…

My thoughts anyway, thanks for reading.

Simon Coleman.

One Reply to “Pick your problems…”

  1. Nicely put! I also think that we have to embrace imperfection and not get frustrated because we expect the impossible. We’ll never run out of problems, but we can learn to tackle them with calm and a smile 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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